Angel carefully wrapped Connor's-- or more accurately, Andrew's-- arm. "Are you okay, Andrew?"

Andrew looked down at the bite from the Hellhound. "It should hurt, shouldn't it?" He frowned deeply. "But it just kinda... Stings."

"That's normal," Connor muttered. He sank down deeply in his chair. "I can usually ignore most injuries. It's only the really serious ones that hurt. It helps when the adrenaline is pumping." He looked thoroughly miserable.

"Oh, Ace..." Salome tried to run her hands through Connor's hair, but found Andrew's spikey style much more difficult to run her fingers through. She grimaced at the gel left on her hands. "Hey... Let's figure out what's going on."

Spike rolled his eyes, leaning back in his seat. "Well, I think they changed bodies."

Salome glared at Spike angrily. "You're not helping, Spike."

Spike glared back at Salome. " You were the one who killed the guy before we had a chance to find out why he wanted to switch Connor and Andrew."

"It was a reflex!" Salome snapped angrily. "He was threatening me and my friends."

Connor suddenly sat up straight. "He was threatening you."

Salome frowned. "That's what I just said, Ace."

Connor shook his head. "No, that's not what I mean. I mean, he was threatening you . He wasn't aiming for me. He was aiming for you. We don't need to find out why he wanted to switch me and Andrew... We need to find out why he wanted to switch you and Andrew."

Salome blinked, slightly taken aback. She quickly regained her composure. "It doesn't matter."

"Yes it does!" Connor exclaimed. "That thing was aiming for you! I want to know why!"

Salome looked at Connor sternly. "I'm more worried about getting you and Andrew back where you're supposed to be."

Connor clutched Salome's shoulders and looked deeply into her eyes. Unfortunately, his intense look wasn't nearly as effective in Andrew's body. "Magnimus is gunning for you personally. She probably sent that guy after you."

Salome shook her head. "Why? What's the point of putting my spirit in Andrew's body."

Connor paused. "I haven't thought that far ahead yet." His brow furrowed. "Maybe she thought I'd dump you if you looked like Andrew."

Andrew crossed his arms over his chest, pouting. "I'm not that bad looking."

"Illyria," Angel muttered.

Connor looked over at his father. "What are you talking about?"

"Salome... Your powers are a lot like Illyria's, right?" He scowled deeply.

Salome licked her lips slowly. "Well... I can never dream to have the tremendous might of the God-King of the Priordium... But it works on the same principle."

"Illyria nearly self-destructed," Spike said, catching onto Angel's line of thought. "Fred's body couldn't contain Illyria's powers."

Angel nodded. "Maybe Magnimus thought..."

Andrew shrank down. "She thought I was weak enough." He sank down into a chair at the kitchen table, cradling his head in his hands.

"She was trying to kill both of them," Connor said fiercely, a growl in his voice. Never had Andrew sounded so angry. He took his hands off Salome's shoulders, tightening them into fists. "I'm tired of this. She's not getting away with it this time."

"Connor..." Salome said warningly. "I don't think that's a good idea..."

" No! " Connor snapped. He stormed off. "I'm ending this."

Connor slammed his hands against the kitchen door. It didn't budge and he was thrown off his feet, landing on his back.

Angel, Spike, Salome and Andrew looked down at him worriedly.

Connor groaned, trying to sit up. ".... Ow."

"That looks like it hurt," Spike commented.

Connor put a hand to his forehead. "So my powers are still in my body, huh?"

Angel winced. "Let's figure out how to switch you back before you go after Magnimus."

"That would be nice," Connor's face was red as Angel and Spike helped him to his feet.

"Wait... If Connor's like that." Andrew took a step back. He looked down at his hands. A smile spread over his face and his blue eyes sparkled. "Now I'm the Destroyer."

Salome sighed. "This is not going to be pretty."

****

Oni blushed deeply as Crawford led her to the door. She looked down, tendrils of hair falling in front of her face. "This has been a most enjoyable outing, Crawford. I thank you for accompanying me to the theatrical presentation."

"I'm glad you enjoyed it." Crawford stopped stopped in front of the door. He put a hand on Oni's cheek, stroking it gently. "You were smiling through the entire show."

"It was very enjoyable," Oni's cheeks were turning a very deep shade of red. "I can understand why you are so enamoured with Shakespeare. The cadence of the language..."

Crawford took a step closer. "Do you mind if I kiss you?"

Oni's eyes widened. "Do I mind if..." Her tongue darted out, wetting her lips. "You are asking my permission to perform a preliminary mating ritual?"

Crawford looked down, turning his head away. "I... I didn't want you to be disgusted if I tried."

"Disgusted?" Oni frowned, cocking her head. "Why would I be disgusted by you?"

"Look at me!" Crawford whispered, his hand trembling as he touched the mutated side of his face. "Just... Look at me."

Oni shook her head. "I do not understand... Why do you believe your appearance would cause me to not wish to press our lips together?"

"I'm hideous," Crawford whispered. "I know that."

"That's not..." Oni shook her head furiously. "That's not it at all! I think you are very aesthetically pleasing."

Crawford took a step back. "But I don't look human."

Oni let out a small laugh. "Well, that is an advantage, is it not? Humans are not particularly my type."

Crawford paused. "You... You really like me?"

Oni nodded slowly. "Yes. You are kind and very visually stimulating to me. You also saved my life from an insane actor wizard. That endears you greatly to me. But..."

"But?" Crawford repeated, his frown deepening.

"I was involved with a man." Oni lowered her head, unable to meet Crawford's eyes. She fidgeted, very uncomfortable. "Well, we were not involved. But we were... Well, I can't explain it. It was... Very complicated."

Crawford's eyes were filled with confusion and sadness. "Are you still in love with him?"

Oni licked her lips slowly, thinking about the question. She raised her head slowly. "We were not together. That may be what confuses me the most. We had no closure, because there was nothing to close. I do not wish you to think I am using you to get above Wesley."

Crawford ran a hand through his hair. "I wouldn't think that."

Oni's smiled softly. "You wouldn't?"

Crawford shifted uncomfortably. "Well... I kinda do now ."

The smile faded from Oni's face. She looked down once again. "Oh."

Crawford bit his lip, running a hand through his hair again. "This guy... He was... A demon?"

Oni shook her head. "No. He was a human." She then paused, considering it. "Well, I suppose it is debatable. He was human and then died and was resurrected by a demon who shared a body with him for months. Now he's different."

Crawford's brow furrowed. His head tilted in curiosity. "Is everything in your life so complicated?"

Oni nodded. "Yes. I am afraid so." She began to open the door. "Well, I'll just..."

Crawford reached out, grabbing Oni's wrist. "Hold on..." He shook his head. "Where are you going?"

"I am going into my home," Oni replied. "I thought you would not want to have anything else to do with me."

Crawford's twisted mouth curled in a smile. "Do you think I would give up on you that easily?"

Oni blinked. "Huh?"

"I'm not going to give up on you just because there's some guy you didn't really date." Crawford slipped an arm around Oni's waist. "I'll make you forget all about him."

"Forget all about him..." Oni repeated, wetting her lips.

"All about him." Crawford's mouth covered hers. He kissed her passionately.

****

Jamie and Mandy sat on the couch in the living room. Their eyes were wide as they watched Andrew-- no, Connor-- pace back and forth in the living room.

"This is freaking me out..." Jamie said. "Is it just me, or is this freaking anyone out?"

Connor turned to Jamie, glaring at him. "It's not just you."

Mandy slipped off the couch, looking over Connor closely. She reached in, poking him in the cheek with her index finger.

Scowling, Connor pushed her hand away. "Don't do that!" There was a distinct whine in his voice.

Mandy pursed her lips, narrowing her gaze. She then burst out laughing. "Definitely not as threatening in that body."

"Hey!" Andrew protested. "I can be threatening."

Salome pat Andrew on the shoulder. "Of course you can, Andrew. Don't be so defensive."

"Don't patronise me!" Andrew jerked away from Salome before stalking off.

Salome frowned deeply, watching him go. "Huh. So the storming off still works even with Andrew behind the wheel."

Oni strolled in, her cheeks pink and her steps slightly off-balance. She passed by Andrew. "Happy evening, Connor."

"I'm Andrew!" He snapped angrily.

Oni frowned as Andrew continued off up the stairs. She rubbed the back of her neck. "Umm... Did he just say..."

"How was your date?" Salome asked. She draped her arms over Connor's shoulders, but he pulled away from her, making her frown.

"It was an enjoyable outing. So what is occurring?" Her eyes were slightly wide. "Why is Salome being affectionate with Mr. Wells?" She shook her head slowly. "Connor didn't really mean..."

"He's actually Andrew," Jamie sighed. "There was some sort of body swap. It was meant for Salome, but Connor got in the way."

"Magnimus?" Oni asked.

"Angel and Spike are out looking for her," Mandy sighed. "But we're getting nowhere. Demon girl killed our only lead."

"I killed a demon , not a lead!" Salome replied waspishly, black eyes narrowing on the Slayer. "Can you please differentiate?"

"I call it how I see it," Mandy snapped back. " You screwed up, Demon Girl. Just own up to it."

"She didn't," Connor muttered quietly.

Mandy rolled her eyes. "You're just defending her because--"

Connor shook his head. "No. I'm not." He looked up at Mandy, his eyes fierce. "When it comes to fighting, the most important thing is to get the demon. That's what Salome did. Whatever happened to me and Andrew... I mean, at least we didn't die . It doesn't really matter if I'm the one with the powers or Andrew is... As long as one of us is a Champion."

Salome frowned deeply. "Ace?"

Connor got up. He ran a hand through his hair. "I'm going to bed." He shook his head. "I think this body gets tired quicker than mine."

He ran a hand over Salome's hair as he passed by. "I'm going to sleep in the spare room, okay?"

Jamie shook his head. "You can't, Riley. Your dad and Spike, remember?"

Connor groaned. "I forgot."

"Don't be a dumbass," Salome hissed softly. "If you're going to sleep, go into our room. You don't have to hide yourself just because...."

Connor put his hand over Salome's mouth. "Don't. Just... Don't."

Salome kept talking, but it was muffled by Connor's hand. After a moment, he pulled his hand away.

She wrinkled her nose in disgust. "Why do you hands smell like Vaseline and fruit roll-ups?"

Connor frowned before sniffing his palm carefully. He shook his head. "You know, I really don't want to ask."

****

Spike sauntered down the street beside Angel. He held an axe casually over his shoulder. "So... Andrew is your son now."

"Andrew is not my son!" Angel protested, pointing his sword at Spike. He glared at Spike, who was grinning. "Can you stop looking at me like that?"

Spike's grin just grew larger and he laughed.

Angel shook his head savagely. "Why must you gain so much pleasure from this?"

Spike thought about it for a long moment. His brow furrowed slightly, the grin leaving his face. He then turned his head to face Angel again. "I think I'm still mad at you. For not telling me about him for so long."

Angel glared at Spike. He shook his head slowly. "That's not like you. You don't care about my life."

Spike shrugged. "Okay, you got me there..."

Angel's gaze narrowed. "So why are you riding me?"

"Well, you're not the only one involved in this story, are you, Mister Me-Me-Me." Spike cocked his head. "Do you think that maybe I might be worried about isn't you?"

Angel's look of annoyance turned to puzzlement. "There is only one person in the world that you care about..."

Spike arched a brow.

Angel shook his head. "Fine. There's two people in the world you care about. You and Buffy. I don't remember you and Buffy being my son."

"I do have emotions," Spike said. "All souled and full of good intentions. Besides, I think the kid's gotten a raw deal and the last thing he needs is you denying his existence."

"Everyone knows about him now!" Angel protested.

"And you still treat him like crap," Spike spat. "And I'm not talking about you turning into Angelus and trying to rip his throat out and unleash your sadistic playful side on all of his friends. I'm talking about you ignoring his existence until you decide to show up and crap all over his life."

"I have not crapped all over his life!" Angel's voice was slightly shrill.

"Oh, come on!" Spike rolled his eyes. "The second you got here, you've done nothing but complain about how he won't let any Slayer in town but Blondie. How he's risking some pointless degree by fighting all the time. How he and little Miss Demon are so obviously going to start popping out little super-strong, purple-haired rugrats as soon as you actually let them be alone."

"I've only done the last one," Angel said quietly.

"News for you, Peaches," Spike let out a small, derisive laugh. "Crap all over the love of his life and crap all over it."

Angel shook his head fiercely. "So you're giving me trouble because of Salome ?"

"I'm giving you trouble because of Connor ," Spike spat. "You may find this impossible to believe, but I actually like the kid. I think he's decent, despite springing out of the unholy union you and Darla. So believe me when I say I'm going to be on your back until you treat him like he deserves. Kid deserves a life."

Angel turned away and began to stalk down the street once again. "Right now, I'm just worried about getting him back in the right life."

****

Andrew paced back and forth in his bedroom. He was like a caged tiger, his whipcord lean body tense, at the ready.

He swung his fist, knocking his twelve-inch Dana Scully doll off of its stand. "Scully!" He cried, picking her up and setting her back on the stand. He gently stroked her hair. "I just... I just don't know what's wrong with me."

He looked down at his hands. He balled them into fists. "There's... There's so much in here. I can feel it. They keep making fun of me..."

He raked his fingers through his long, brown hair. "I'm the Destroyer now. And the Destroyer..." He looked down at his hands once again. "The Destroyer destroys." He suddenly grinned. "Oh, this is going to be so wicked!"

He went to his closet and took out a sword. He opened his window and began to climb out. "We'll show them I can champion with the rest of them."

ACT THREE