The Nyazian Prophecies

Spike sat on the edge of the low brick wall surrounding the front yard of the decrepit house. A cigarette dangled casually from his lips. "You know... Your son is a super being who grew up in a hell dimension. I don't think he needs so much active parenting."

Angel leaned against the wall and shrugged noncommittally. "Well, as long as we're in town..."

"As long as we're in town, we might as well go down to Caritas and get a pint," Spike pointed out. "Not sitting around waiting for your boy to finish his errands, worrying he's going to get himself into trouble."

Angel turned to his companion, glaring. "You know, you didn't have to come with me. You could have gone back out with Illyria."

"Didn't feel like it." Spike tossed his cigarette butt onto the sidewalk and let it burn out. "She went looking for something down in South America. Didn't think it would agree with my fair complexion."

Spike shrugged. "I dunno. Some weird God King reason. I didn't really feel like getting into it."

Angel kept glaring at Spike. "So you decided to hang around me and bitch about the time I spend with my son?"

"You're not spending time with him!" Spike exclaimed. "You're following him around like a puppy because you feel guilty about what happened."

Angel crossed his arms over his chest, his eyes darkening. "Because a week and a half is all a kid needs to get over nearly being killed by his father."

Spike shrugged. "Well, you already killed him once. The way I see it, you're one up this time."

Spike smirked in a very self-satisfied manner. "I'm keeping you honest, Peaches. Someone's got to make sure your head isn't up your arse."

"Oh, come on, Angel!" Spike jumped off the wall, squaring off against Angel. "Of all of the traumas that kid's gone through, seeing you as Angelus for a couple hours is pretty mild. Not to mention you're treating him like a four-year-old."

Spike rolled his eyes. "He's a four-year-old who's twenty-one, in his third year of university and living in sin with a demon babe. He doesn't need you to coddle him."

"I'm trying to--" Connor exited the dilapidated house and Angel abruptly ended his tirade. "Did you get what you needed?" Connor was carrying a long, thin package wrapped in burlap. Angel looked very relieved to have a distraction from his conversation with Spike.

"Yeah." Connor smiled broadly. "It was exactly what I was looking for." He looked between the two vampires. "Did I... Uh... Interrupt something?"

Spike shook his head. "It was nothing, kid. Your dad was just acting like a git again. So what did you get?"

"It my anniversary tomorrow," Connor explained. His cheeks flushed. "You know... Me and Salome. So I wanted to get her something." He pulled off the burlap covering, revealing the shining broadsword.

"Nice, huh?" Connor beamed, doing a few test swings. "Guy's got magic hands. Well... Magic pincers, but you get the idea. It's got perfect balance...."

Angel's frown deepened. "You bought your girlfriend a sword for your anniversary."

Connor shook his head fractionally. "Why do you keep repeating what I said? She needs a sword. The Nyazian Fang's been broken for over a month."

"What are you talking about?" Connor protested. "This is absolutely beautiful ."

Spike chuckled. "Kid, if your girl thinks that's a good anniversary present... Marry her. Now . You'll never find someone who understands-- OW!"

Angel had jabbed his elbow into Spike's gut. "Don't encourage my son to get married," he hissed.

"Well, if you don't like it..." Spike smiled at Angel sweetly. "I'll offer to be ring bearer."

Angel scowled. "Is it that hard for you to respect my wishes about my son?" He strode off back towards Lamia House.

Spike followed close behind him. "It's hard to do anything with 'you' and 'respect' in the same sentence."

"He's been shagging her nightly for a year!" Spike yelled back. "I think the idea's already planted."

Angel threw his hands up in the air in frustration. "Then he really doesn't need your encouragement!"

Connor pushed Spike and Angel away from each other. "Just kiss and get it over with!" He spat fiercely, striding ahead.


Vincent Kartheiser	Anna Paquin	Bret Harrison	Kou Shibasaki	Allison Mack	and Tom Lenk

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Based on the Characters by Joss Whedon	Created by Emcee

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Special Guest Stars

Joel Grey

James Marsters
as Spike

David Boreanaz
as Angel

Guest Starring

Nicole DeBoer
Archie Kao
Troy T. Blendell

Written by

Emcee

Andrew sat at the kitchen table in Lamia House with his head in his hands. Jack was circling his ankles, trying to get attention. Andrew sighed heavily as he watched Jamie push Mandy up against the stove, their hands linked. "I'm sorry, Babe." He leaned in, kissing her soundly. "I gotta run the store today."

Mandy whined softly, pouting. "But they're doing a reading of Midsummer in the park!"

"Only for a hour and half!" Mandy protested. "We'll be done before the reading starts."

"But then he's working with Connor and he's got a conference call with the Watchers. He needs me to take care of things down at Monkeys. He does it all week while I'm in school."

Spike strode in, duster over his shoulder. He tossed it down onto a chair before throwing himself down and watching the young Slayer pull her boyfriend close. "Maybe we can go out tonight?" Mandy asked quietly.

"Connor can do it with his dad and Spike." Mandy glanced behind her over at Spike. "Right, Spike?"

Spike gave her a mock salute. "Snog to your heart's content, goldilocks. I got it covered." He paused. "But you might want to clear it with the kid first."

Connor entered the kitchen, his arms wrapped around Salome's waist. He was carrying her a foot of the ground, his face buried in her purple tresses. "Do you realise it was a year ago I was breaking those handcuffs and kissing you?"

Salome was nearly purring as Connor kissed her neck. "I know, Ace. And it's been a very good year."

Connor set Salome down onto the ground and turned her to face him. He slipped his hands down to her backside, urging her closer before kissing her hungrily. "You know I love you, Beautiful?"

Salome slid her fingers through Connor's hair. "If there's anything I do know..."

Spike rolled his eyes, gesturing to the couple. "The kid might be too busy with his own Shag-a-thon to kill things."

Connor pulled away from Salome briefly, giving Spike a dirty look. "I think my girl and I can handle patrolling."

Spike leaned back, stroking Jack as the small kitten jumped up into his lap. "No. I just think you're going to desecrate some poor sod's grave."

Connor gave Spike an angry look, one that more than proved to the vampire that he was Angel's son. "You don't have that high of an opinion of me then."

Salome looked up at Connor, giving him a small smile. "You've got to admit, Ace... It's kinda accurate. Remember..."

Connor threw his hands over Salome's mouth. "I don't think we need to get into that." He gave her a small smile.

Salome took his hand, pulling it away from his mouth. "Come on... Admit it, Ace. You liked it."

"Never said I didn't." Connor leaned in, nuzzling Salome's nose. "I just don't think we have to share it with everyone."

"I think we'd all appreciate it." Angel pushed past Connor and Salome and sat down beside Spike.

Salome pulled away from Connor, smiling. "Hey Angel... Did you see the sword Connor gave me?" She let out a small, delighted laugh. "It's gorgeous."

Connor scowled at his father before turning away. He jumped when saw the masked man garbed in black behind him.

"I frightened you," the masked man sighed, voice full of woe. He pulled off his mask, the partially demonic face of Crawford Lee revealed.

"You snuck up on me," Connor pointed out. "I don't do well with sneaky. It doesn't happen to me much. So good on you."

"Maybe if you weren't so concerned with Salome's breasts," Andrew whispered bitterly.

The scowl on Connor's face made it clear he had heard the comment, but he chose to ignore it, keeping his attention on Crawford. "You looking for Oni?"

Crawford nodded. "I am taking her to see a reading of Midsummer Night's Dream in the park today."

"Lucky!" Mandy sighed. "You gotta tell me how it is. I played Puck back in '97."

"It must have been very difficult for you to play an inanimate object." Oni commented as she walked into the room, stopping beside Crawford. She frowned when she noted the strangle looks from her friends. "What? Puck is the disc-shaped object Connor and James use when they play their favoured sport on frozen water as opposed to the roadway, is it not?"

"Different Puck, Ohn," Mandy replied. "Anyway... Have fun." She looked over Oni, who was dressed in a very pretty blue dress, her dark hair swept up in a bun. "You look great."

"Thank you kindly, Mandelina," Oni smiled before turning to Crawford. "Are you ready to go?"

Crawford held out his arm for Oni to take. "I have found us a lovely tree from which to watch the reading without disturbing the rest of the audience."

Oni sighed as she allowed Crawford to lead her away. "There is no need to be ashamed of your affliction, Crawford. We are simply patrons of the arts like everyone else. No one will notice your features if the performers are adequate...."

Oni and Crawford left, still discussing Crawford's desire to hide. While Oni remained very calm, Crawford grew more and more agitated.

Salome frowned slightly. " Nothing rattles her. You know, I think we ought to check if that girl is a robot... There are life-like robots, aren't there?"

Salome frowned at their discomfort. "Well, I need to make my exit too. I've got to help Lorne out this morning if I want the night off." She gave Connor a quick kiss. "You keeping yourself busy today?"

"That's my boy." Salome gave him a kiss on the hand. "Stay out of trouble." She waved to the occupants of the kitchen. "See you guys later!"

"We'll walk out with you," Jamie said, arm slung over Mandy's shoulders. "I have to get myself to the store." He looked down at Mandy. "You did want to walk with me, right?"

Jamie waved his hand dismissively and he and Mandy followed Salome out the door.

"So what are you going to do with yourself now that your lady fair is out of shagging distance?" Spike asked Connor casually, putting his feet up on the kitchen table, knocking Andrew's elbow slightly and making his head dip as he lost his support.

Connor stretched his arms above his head, working the kinks out of his muscles. He turned to Angel. "You up for some sparring, Dad?"

Connor nodded. "Cool." He bounded down the stairs to the basement. "Meet you down there!"

"Well." Spike put his hands behind his head. "That was a little pathetic, wasn't it?" He looked over at Andrew, waiting for his agreement, but it didn't come. He frowned slightly. "What's with you?"

"What?" Andrew looked up, the look if displeasure on his face evident. "It's nothing."

"Bollocks." Spike sat up straight. "You're not being nearly as annoying as usual. Something's bugging you."

"Right, because you're so apt to sulk in the corner." Spike nodded slowly. "What's going on with you, Andy? Thought you'd be over the moon about me and Broodpants being here."

"I love you guys being here!" Andrew said, sitting bolt upright. "How can you think that I..."

Spike held up his hands. "Calm down, Andy. Didn't mean it like that. I just want to know what's going on." He scowled. "Listen, I actually care about what's wrong. Don't make me drag it out or I'm likely to get bored and go join the Father and Son violencefest in the basement."

Andrew watched Spike for a long moment, considering what to say. He sighed deeply. "It's just...." He rested his chin against his hand again. "Well, Connor and Salome have been together for a year, right?"

"And that's it for them, isn't it?" Andrew shook his head "They're going to be together until one of them dies, aren't they?"

"Didn't think the kid wasn't your type." Spike shrugged. "Oh well. Different strokes for different folks. Probably better he's with someone else. He'd have to give you the talk otherwise. That'd probably be awkward."

" What? " Andrew jumped to his feet. "I..." His voice faltered. "...I so do not..."

"I don't!" Andrew cried. When he realized he was no closer in convincing Spike, he sank back down into his chair. "It's not about that. It's not specific. Connor and Salome have been together for a year and they're going to be together for a lot longer. And Mandy and Jay seem really happy together too."

"It's not about that!" Andrew's voice was shrill. "It's Oni too. She's with Crawford now, I think. And before that, there was that thing with Wes... Everyone is pairing up. And then there's me. And I'm just me."

Spike stared at Andrew rather dumbly, unsure of what to say to the young man. Finally, he managed out. "Shame."

"What am I supposed to do?" Andrew asked desperately. "All of my friends have found people to be with. And I'm left all alone."

Spike shifted uncomfortably. "You... Tried to meet anyone?" He rubbed the back of his head. "You're young, attractive and... Weird. Some people like that."

"Don't look too deep into it," Spike begged. "You're not a troll. Some..." He looked over Andrew. "... One is going to be into you."

Spike shrugged noncommittally. "Or you'll be into them. Don't know how you like to do it."

"But why ?" Andrew asked desperately. "I'm not funny or smart like Jay, or a total babe like Salome, or strong like Connor..."

"Maybe you should go to a convention or something," Spike suggested. "Harris used to yammer on about those. Bet you could find someone there."

Andrew shook his head, eyes widening. "No way. You wouldn't believe how mean those people can be." He shook his head. "I just wish I was cool. Like Connor. Like you. You guys have no problem getting people to fall in love with you."

Spike rolled his eyes, groaning. "Do I even need to remind you of the state of all my relationships? Or, for that matter, Connor's? He's just lucked out now."

Andrew shook his head. "You're wrong. You guys... You're just cooler. And, for once, I wish I could be like that. Things would be so much easier."

Magnimus paced back and forth in her lair, tearing her fingers through her short brown hair. "You saw her? That little purple-haired bitch?"

The demon that knelt before the Goddess, a ruddy-complexed, tall demon, nodded. "Yes, your highness. She was at Caritas."

Magnimus shook her head savagely. "Angelus was supposed to be the most fearsome killer the world has ever seen and he wasn't able to take out a single one of Connor's friends?"

Jinx fell to his knees next to the other demon. "Most glorious Magnimus, surely you must possess the abilities to tear the Destroyer from his friends? Why don't you use them?"

Magnimus kicked Jinx hard, knocking him onto his back. "Fool. I could try. But the connection between the Destroyer and the Nyazian is beyond normal affection. They're psychically bonded." She steepled her fingers. "I may be powerful, but elevating the Destroyer while his mortal soul is entwined with another... I have no idea what the repercussion of that would be. I don't want to take my chances giving him such power while he's still in her clutches. The others I can deal with, but Salome..." Magnimus' eyes darkened. "She needs to go."

"We will send our most fearsome followers against her," Jinx said brightly, getting back onto his knees and bowing before Magnimus. "She will be no trouble for..."

"She is the Qwa-Ha Xahn of Illyria," Magnimus snapped angrily. "You think she got that position by being a pushover? The girl has too much power to just attack."

Magnimus put her hands on her hips. "Well, it's about time you got here. So what do you think?"

"Miss Simpson is indeed powerful," Doc said, smiling sweetly. "Cyvus Vail merely enhanced her abilities. Such a Nyazian is very difficult to fight."

Doc picked up a book, thumbing through it. "With your great interest in Miss Simpson, I've taken it upon myself to research the Nya-Za Illyrians . A very peculiar species, I must say. Quite different from most I've encountered. One oddity is their ability to change bodies."

Magnimus rolled her eyes. "Do you have a point, Doc? Or do you just like to hear yourself speak?"

"Your Highness, I would never waste your time with trifles." Doc's reptilian tongue darted out. "Because of their ability to switch bodies, Nyazians powers are tied to their souls, as opposed to their bodies. This is unlike most demonic species, in which their powers are specific to their physical form."

Magnimus shook her head. "And... Why did this important? It just means it'll be even harder to kill her."

"Not necessarily," Doc turned a page in his book. "According to what I've read, when Nyazians change bodies, if the body they've chosen to take over is unable to contain their essence, the shell will be destroyed by the radiant energies. This nearly happened to Illyria a year and a half ago when she first entered Miss Burkle, but she was rescued at the last moment."

Magnimus now looked intrigued. "If we were to force Salome into a body unable to contain her powers..."

"Both the body and Miss Simpson's essence would be destroyed." Doc finished, smiling broadly.

Magnimus nodded slowly. "So now we just need to find a way to exchange Salome's soul with a human."

"You think so little of me, your highness." Doc led a robed man into the room. "You think I haven't discovered that already?"

Salome walked along through the Quad, one hand clutching her sword and the other Connor's hand. She sighed deeply, slightly exasperated. "Dammit, the fissures to Quortoth are widening every day... But we still can't find a single demon for me to test my new sword on?"

Andrew looked over his shoulder at Salome. "You're weird, you know that, Sal? You should be relieved we can't find any demons."

Connor sighed, putting an arm around Salome's shoulders, careful not to cut her on his arm mounted blade. "Well, it's a bit hard with you here doing the monthly reports. You always insist we kill at least one demon. It would be nice to get it over with."

"Besides, I want to try this thing out." Salome looked down at her shining new sword. "This is really great, Ace."

"You're welcome, Beautiful." He gave her a quick kiss before turning his attention back to his surroundings.

Angel looked from the couple, to Spike and finally, to Andrew. "We might be scaring them off. Being in such a big crowd. Maybe we should split up."

Spike nodded. "'S a thought." He looked mildly vexed at admitting Angel had a good idea.

"We'll head towards the Coffee House," Angel said with a slight nod. He then looked at Connor for a moment. "Are you going to be okay?"

Connor let out a sigh, shaking his head. "Dad, I've been patrolling without you for over a year. I think I can handle a night with Sal and Andrew."

"Yell if you need us," Angel said seriously, ignoring Connor's irritation. "I'll be able to hear you."

He and Spike took off towards the Coffee House. Connor pulled Salome along with him, following Andrew in the opposite direction.

"So what was that?" Andrew asked. "If he's worried about you... Why was he smiling?"

Salome grinned. "It's pretty normal son stuff... Getting annoyed about his protectiveness." She crinkled her nose. "I think it's sweet."

"Sweet?" Connor repeated. He shook his head. "I don't know what you're--". He suddenly went very still, raising his head. He was like a dog that had caught scent of prey. He slowly took his arm off of Salome's shoulders and reached into the back of his jeans, drawing out his knife. "Andrew, get somewhere safe."

Before Connor could respond, a demon had tackled him to the ground. It was a large wolf-like creature. Not quite a werewolf, but something very similar.

Andrew watched helplessly as Connor struggled against the beast. Recognition dawned on his face finally. "A Hellhound.."

"Get out of here!" Connor yelled. He bellowed in pain as the demonic dog champed down on his arm.

Salome swung her sword, burying it in the Hellhound's neck. She was unable to cut cleanly through the sinewy flesh, only managing to give it a large gash. It was enough to get the creature's attention away from Connor. It raised its head and snapped at Salome.

Connor brought both feet up, pressing against the Hellhound's belly. He pushed hard, knocking the heavy devil dog off of him. He rolled out and scrambled back onto his feet.

Andrew shuddered as he heard another dangerous growl behind him. "Maybe it's a good idea to yell?"

"Why?" Connor asked. He smirked as he circled the first Hellhound. "I think we can handle a couple of mutts." He slash it across the throat with his arm blade, felling it.

Salome took a step towards the second and paused. Her eyes widened. "Umm... It might be a little harder than we thought."

The tall, slender man garbed in black robes approached Salome slowly, his roughly-hewn wooden staff held out towards her.

Salome dodged out of the way, doing a cartwheel and landing in front of the second Hellhound. She swung her sword, decapitating the beast. She looked back to the wizard and noted he had changed his aim. "Andrew!" She cried.

"Watch out!" She screamed, but it was too late. A red glow had emanated from the staff, striking Andrew in the chest. It blasted him back almost three feet. He didn't move once he hit the ground.

"Sal!" Connor raced towards his girlfriend, grabbing her and pushing her to the ground. The red glow caught him in the shoulder. He went limp and released Salome, and rolled across the ground.

Salome's eyes turned pitch black and the purple marks appeared on her face. She turned her head up the glare at the wizard menacingly. "You don't know what you've done."

She flew to her feet, hands outstretched. Her hands sparked with magical lightening.

The wizard screamed as he was engulfed in the power erupting from Salome's hands. His body seemed to collapse, leaving nothing but his empty robes. His staff, now broken in half, landed on top of the robes.

"This place just lit up like a Christmas Tree," Spike said. He stopped in front of Salome, blinking. "Hold on... That was you?"

"I took care of it." Salome lowered her hands, the marks disappearing from her face.

Connor was struggling to sit up. Salome ran to his side. "Ace? Are you all right?"

Angel, Salome and Spike stared at Andrew in shock. "Connor....?" Angel asked slowly, hesitantly.